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The far more successful arch-nemesis of Jesse Cox and Crendor.

First mentioned: Episode 19

"We're gonna getchu Hardwick!"
-Jesse Cox
"You'll be Softwick soon,"
-Crendor
He went to a stupid school in America filled with stupid people (AKA any school in America).

It is theorised that he has never rapped about beating a man to death with a cucumber.

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